I Bought Jeans Today
God have mercy on my soul for what I have done.
I went into Value Village. I talked about my shopping there earlier, about how it was slumming for entertainment and because I'm horribly cheap. But anyway.
Why am I writing about this? The site's name. And also, it's pretty momentous for me. I haven't worn jeans in 7 years.
I bought a pair of blue jeans for 10 bucks. It was a Point Zero design. The funny thing is that it's got this strap or some shit from the back pocket to right around the thigh, where the pant rivets are. I'm guessing it's for a gun or some other kind of tool.
I know you're bored now, so here's a link to the porn version of Youtube.
I always used to wear jeans. But I stopped wearing jeans. Part of adolescent change, I suppose. Trying to be a grown-up. I couldn't, but I could at least not wear jeans.
So now I'm wearing jeans. I've accepted my childhood, I don't need to prove anything.
A bit of history on denim.
Then everyone in the 50s started wearing jeans to be unique and rebellious, taking workmen's wear and making it cool. Which means that in 2050 maybe this will be cool:
This will be marketed. People will be paying 500 for a special brand name design of this.
By the way, if you care what the brand name of jeans are, you're shallow.
Back to the jeans. It was the symbol of Americans, Cowboys, and all that crap. By the way, when I was watching my uncle's cattle being branded, I noticed they all wore Wrangler's. Like Fosters for Australians, Tim Horton's for Canada, jeans were a product that symbolized a nation. Branding on a sociological scale. A product entering our national subconsciousness, through aggressive marketing, stupid punks trying to rebel, and corporate fatcats sucking off that and making a profit on it.
But whatever, fuck socialism. Sure, jeans have been marketed into our cultural subconsciousness, but they're comfy.
And I always thought kids wore jeans. It was somehow more adult not to wear jeans, because I'd worn jeans all throughout my childhood, before I started thinking about being an adult at adolescent. So now I'm 20, I'm wearing jeans. I stopped trying to be an adult, because I was one already.
By the way, according to an Italian judge, women can't be raped if they're wearing Jeans. Only the wearer can take off the jeans. So another reason to wear jeans - they're rape repellant ("rape-llant") That would be an awesome ad campaign. "Jeans - Rape-proof."
Levi's, contact me, we'll work something out.
I went into Value Village. I talked about my shopping there earlier, about how it was slumming for entertainment and because I'm horribly cheap. But anyway.
Why am I writing about this? The site's name. And also, it's pretty momentous for me. I haven't worn jeans in 7 years.
I bought a pair of blue jeans for 10 bucks. It was a Point Zero design. The funny thing is that it's got this strap or some shit from the back pocket to right around the thigh, where the pant rivets are. I'm guessing it's for a gun or some other kind of tool.
I know you're bored now, so here's a link to the porn version of Youtube.
I always used to wear jeans. But I stopped wearing jeans. Part of adolescent change, I suppose. Trying to be a grown-up. I couldn't, but I could at least not wear jeans.
So now I'm wearing jeans. I've accepted my childhood, I don't need to prove anything.
A bit of history on denim.
Then everyone in the 50s started wearing jeans to be unique and rebellious, taking workmen's wear and making it cool. Which means that in 2050 maybe this will be cool:
This will be marketed. People will be paying 500 for a special brand name design of this.
By the way, if you care what the brand name of jeans are, you're shallow.
Back to the jeans. It was the symbol of Americans, Cowboys, and all that crap. By the way, when I was watching my uncle's cattle being branded, I noticed they all wore Wrangler's. Like Fosters for Australians, Tim Horton's for Canada, jeans were a product that symbolized a nation. Branding on a sociological scale. A product entering our national subconsciousness, through aggressive marketing, stupid punks trying to rebel, and corporate fatcats sucking off that and making a profit on it.
But whatever, fuck socialism. Sure, jeans have been marketed into our cultural subconsciousness, but they're comfy.
And I always thought kids wore jeans. It was somehow more adult not to wear jeans, because I'd worn jeans all throughout my childhood, before I started thinking about being an adult at adolescent. So now I'm 20, I'm wearing jeans. I stopped trying to be an adult, because I was one already.
By the way, according to an Italian judge, women can't be raped if they're wearing Jeans. Only the wearer can take off the jeans. So another reason to wear jeans - they're rape repellant ("rape-llant") That would be an awesome ad campaign. "Jeans - Rape-proof."
Levi's, contact me, we'll work something out.
posted by Marshall McMahon at 3:40 AM
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