Am I A Sexy Bastard?

Two events trying to get my late-night meal.

First off, went to this sandwich shop. They didn't accept credit card, I had to leave. Then as I was exiting the steps, I got whistled at by a black transvestite. Which freaked me out, quite immensely. I so don't swing that way. But I mean, I don't know, she's gotta be lonely. Every date for him/her is The Crying Game. I mean, who really goes for transvestites? Gay dudes? Because gay dudes are interested in dudes who look like dudes. But anyway.

So then I went to Harvey's a block away. I decided to sit near the window, so I could see the world. I'd only my credit card - I'll tell you later why that's important. I was looking out, then I see this homeless man. Make eye contact, then look down. He comes into the store. A transcript:

Homeless: "Please, can I have some change."
Me: "No, I don't have change."
Homeless: "Please, sir, I'm homeless."
Me: "No, I honestly don't have any change."
Homeless: "Well, can I have five bucks?"
(Logic, meet suffering.)
Me: "I don't have five bucks."
Homeless: "Please, sir, I haven't eaten in three days." He began to sniffel.
Me: "Sure, look, I'll buy you something to eat."

Which I did. Like a child, he kept on saying, "Hamburger, french fries, and a coke." They had a Pepsi. I said god bless and left.

It's odd, because I didn't feel good. Probably because he had to ask me. But that's the thing - I won't give you change, but I will give you the things you need to alleviate your suffering. If he would have just started off with I haven't eaten in three days, I would have given him the money.

I don't know, I should have gone out there and helped him. But I tried to avoid him. I think I was just trying to buy him off. I suck.

That is all.